Dealing with hate

Let’s talk about hate. Most bloggers and persons on social media will tell you that they don’t let hate get to them and that they simply ignore it. But for me, at the beginning, it wasn’t that simple. Within the last few weeks I have been receiving more hate than usual. Me being the emotional and sensitive person I am, I let it get to me. I let it bother me until I would start crying.

And yes, while I am an emotional person and it may bother me way more than it probably should, I’m positive that I’m not alone. Receiving hate is never something pleasant, it leaves you with this sense of negativity. The feeling that you aren’t good at what you do (in my case, blogging). It makes you want to quit.

But why let the haters win? Why give them the satisfaction of hurting you? It took me a while to realize this. But now that I have, the hate no longer bothers me. Instead, I reply to hate comments with a pleasant remark or simply just ignore them. Because after all, I don’t need that kind of negativity in my life.

For me, most of the hate comes when I do a post about Veganism…surprise surprise right? Receiving horrible comments on these types of posts no longer affects me. Instead, I remind myself that I am an activist for a reason. That I am a voice for the voiceless. And that what I’m doing is in fact making a difference.

With all of that being said, let’s not confuse hate with constructive criticism. Among the horrible and outright rude hate comments I usually also receive constructive criticism. This is always welcomed, and although may be eye opening and a bit shocking at times, it’s a good reminder that there’s always room for improvement. Not all criticisms are hate.

Despite the hate, there are those who continuously support me and who have been there from the very beginning. You know who you are. Thank you :). I wouldn’t be where I am today if it wasn’t for your support. To those who send me emails or direct messages with pleasant remarks, thank you. You all are the reason that I still do what I do.

It is important to look at the positive. The positive feedback, the feeling of joy you get when someone tells you your posts have helped them, all the positives. And although sometimes one negative comment seems to outweigh all of the positive ones, ignore it. Don’t let the haters bring you down, otherwise they win. And we wouldn’t want that right?

Personally, I blog because it’s something that I really enjoy doing. I love writing posts and getting feedback (when positive) and everything in between. I use my blog as a way of expressing myself and helping others and would never do it just for attention, as believed by some people. It’s really something that I enjoy doing and I’m beyond grateful that I have a platform that I can use to really make an impact on the lives of others.

I’ve learnt to use the hate as motivation to keep going and it pushes me to do better and prove the haters wrong. I’m proud of how far I’ve come and my only regret is not realizing what I know now, sooner.

Remember, don’t let anyone stop you from doing what you love. No matter what it is, you do what you enjoy and what makes you happy 🙂

If there is anyone having a hard time dealing with hate of any kind, feel free to contact me. My inbox is always open 🙂

-Mikayla

36 Comments

  1. YOU’RE SUCH AN INSPIRATION FOR EVERYONE!! Your message was really beautiful and I hope you continue to remain confident about yourself. People are just jealous of your passion, beauty and the way you stand up for the things that matter to you. I know you try your best to respect others beliefs and I don’t know why people don’t have the mental capacity to do the same 🙄 Strong strong curly queen ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

      1. You don’t make a difference.. you just look for attention… everyone gets hate, get over yourself 🙂

        Like

    1. Dear uneducated commentor,
      Have you any idea about the amount of senseless hate and bullying this girl has gone though? BULLYING IS A SERIOUS ISSUE THAT CAUSES SO MUCH EMPTIONAL PAIN! I don’t know if you can wrap your tiny brain around that but I guess you can’t since you’re taking time to ridicule someone who’s speaking up about how her experience with bullying has impacted her. How can you take time off of your day to make fun of and bully a person who’s speaking about the negative impacts of bullying? I suggest you get a hobby!By the way, you apparently care enough about her ‘stupid blog’ to comment on it! Please grow up 🙂 thanks

      Liked by 1 person

  2. To the non pretentious vegan or whatever. Please take a break and remove the large dildo (that is two times the size of your own penis) from your ass and read what I have to say. I won’t waste a lot of your time, even though from what’s I see you have a lot of time to waste leaving hateful comments under an innocent young girl’s blogpost. So before you decide to bully this young lady and write a bunch of bullshit in the comments, take a minute to think about what you’re doing with your time (while she tries to follow her dreams and fight for what she believes in, you spend your time on pornhub or crying about your insecurities, for example your small prick or inability to keep a woman) So my darling, instead of trying to spread hate, take a moment to think and actually use the little underdeveloped brain in your head thank you so very much 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Cyber bullying is nothing just delete the comments or close your eyes :). People get bullied every single day a million times more than you & you don’t hear them talking about it 24/7 and looking for attention.

    Like

    1. Cybulling is not ‘NOTHING’. It’s such a terrible thing to go through! It doesn’t matter if it’s a lot or even a mean word online(btw she falls into the category of getting a lot of hate). It does however matter that someone is so heartless and stupid to make fun of someone for speaking up about a serious issue like this. HOW IN THE WORLD IS SHE DOING THIS FOR ATTENTION? Have you ever used your pea size brain to think that just maybe she posted this to inspire others or in hope of disgusting, hateful people like you to stop cyber bullying her? People like you will always have something senseless and negative to say about everyone. It doesn’t matter if I tell you she does this blog because she’s passionate about her beliefs or she wants to help people! You’ll continue your shit because you just want to make others feel bad about themselves. You hate when people call out bullies because YOU ARE A BULLY!! Do yourself a favour and try not to make people feel like their pain or struggle is insignificant please! People should never feel bad about speaking up 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Y’all haters ridiculous boy. Y’all can’t just be happy for people or leave them alone eh?? Seriously a lil Caribbean girl looking for nothing but to express her feelings and thoughts on a positive platform and allyuh go really look to bully she ??? Esp right after she opened up about herself and her experiences ?? That making any sense ??? If you have a problem with her das something different but doh do the girl so on she blog nah. Legit she not negatively affecting you in any way with her blog so just fleck way if you don’t like it or her. She had the guts to step out in a small island with VERY VERY FEW bloggers and make a name for herself and you really out here trying to belittle that sitting behind a screen and annonomously hating ??? BOY(girl) BAAIII!!! You will never in a million years be half of what she is. Just think about it, man think about how powerful your words are and how they affect the people you project them onto. Better yourself. Better your life. ✌🏼

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I swear I commented on this . People are just so closed minded and hateful . They hide behind their screens and just spew out some of the worst shit . Projecting their insecurities . Keep doing you . Let them sit and stew in their hate .

    Liked by 1 person

  6. First and foremost, good for you! You are doing what makes you happy and sharing your journey. I’m glad you are able to move forward from this kind of negativity. Keep doing this for you. This is your own little slice of the pie to do with what you want. I am proud of you and will continue in my support of you.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. l found that people of colour especially black women receive a lot of hate to be honest but just remember there black women and other people who want to hear your story.People of colour make up most of the world population so its important to hear are story .love betty lovely and honest blog post

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I read the comments and wow! The hate is real…which means you are doing an awesome job! Continue loving what you do and being you. No amount of hate can take that from you and I’m sure that someone may see this and take comfort in knowing you’re there to help them.

    Liked by 1 person

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